It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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