so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Randomize
