Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
