I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
