he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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