go do what you do best...puke behind churches
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
jump out the window naked night went bad
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
