I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
