There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
