What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize