He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize