Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize