i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
