ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
