I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize