and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
