there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize