But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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