There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
People in love make me want to vomit
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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