Taylor Swift is so right about you.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
