you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
