Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize
