Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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