Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
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