I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
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