I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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