New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
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