and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Drake has all the answers
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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