Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
i've created a new STD.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
