A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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