Ambien. No doubt about it.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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