Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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