Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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