You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize