You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
