i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
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Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
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What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
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