I wish i was in the wii world.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
