idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
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the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
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If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
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