I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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