We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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