dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
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