are you still at the devil's house?
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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