try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
