Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
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shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
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I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
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