Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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