Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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