Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
he shaved USA in his pubs
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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