Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Randomize
