the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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