Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
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Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
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I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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