Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm. http://tfl.nu/hugj
  Replies (10) Good night (5156) Bad night (927)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together... http://tfl.nu/sic1
  Replies (13) Good night (5034) Bad night (1049)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (559): The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous. http://tfl.nu/xrml
  Replies (6) Good night (3016) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina http://tfl.nu/jm59
  Replies (10) Good night (3319) Bad night (1106)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way. http://tfl.nu/08h1
  Replies (5) Good night (1063) Bad night (567)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me http://tfl.nu/sx3p
  Replies (9) Good night (1476) Bad night (823)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class. http://tfl.nu/5a7w
  Replies (3) Good night (643) Bad night (782)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day. http://tfl.nu/rkpb
  Replies (6) Good night (576) Bad night (1436)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life? http://tfl.nu/cxgm
  Replies (2) Good night (761) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (937): View more from Ohio

  I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (937): I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe. http://tfl.nu/np5r
  Replies (10) Good night (1535) Bad night (377)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating... http://tfl.nu/lvgu
  Replies (6) Good night (363) Bad night (676)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis. http://tfl.nu/t3p3
  Replies (1) Good night (723) Bad night (236)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong http://tfl.nu/twjt
  Replies (4) Good night (648) Bad night (283)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (757): Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window? http://tfl.nu/40u0
  Replies (6) Good night (562) Bad night (222)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot. http://tfl.nu/as5j
  Replies (1) Good night (909) Bad night (195)

Randomize