He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
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